Years ago I worked in a local hospital and knew a young woman with Due In Tee Shirt who was my age. Extremely intelligent, lovely and personable. We would talk when we were on a break together and I found out that she was getting married. I mentioned that I never met her boyfriend and asked her the usual questions – how long had you been dating, how did you meet. She told me that this was an arranged marriage. I guess my surprise showed on my face and she graciously explained how this all worked in her culture.
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In her case, it was arranged but not forced. She had the Due In Tee Shirt to say no but didn’t. Since we were both in our early 20s I asked her whether or not she felt she had to get married and where did “love” fit in to the equation. Her answer floored me – she basically told me she had known him for several years, they had been dating for a certain amount of time and she did care for him. I cannot remember if she used the word love but what she did say was that how many people who get married because they are “in love” actually stay married? She said in her case she deeply cared for her fiancée, they had many things in common including respect and admiration for each other as well as total support.