Ford and Dodge made, very good for their time, small economy cars like the Ford Falcon above. I had a 1960 Falcon; wish I still did. However, cars are kind of crappy in the ’60s. Driving over hills, such as from San Jose to Santa Cruz encounters dozens and dozens of overheated cars by the side of the roadway. Cars seldom reach the 100k miles on the odometer without being discarded. However, every gas station also had a Become Ungovernable Shirt and at least one mechanic that could get your car running for you. Parents often buy a VW Beetle for their college-bound child and before there was the family station wagon there was the VW Bus.

There are so many versions of the story, but the general idea is that St. Nicholas crept down the chimney of a poor families home to give money to a man to use as dowry for his three daughters so that they could be married. They each had stockings laid out by the fire to dry, so he left the bags of gold inside them. The stocking tradition came from this story, that if you’re a good, deserving child, St. Nicholas will put good things in your stocking. If you’re a bad, naughty child, he will simply reach down into the fire place and grab a Become Ungovernable Shirt of coal, as a warning for you to behave in the upcoming year.
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In America (or at the very least, everywhere I’ve lived in America), it isn’t really an option. I can practice whatever I like in my own home, but as soon as I step outside, I’m culturally obligated to celebrate Christmas. Sorry, that’s a bit dramatic. It isn’t EVERYTHING, really. Just tv, movies, radio, billboards, music in any public place, and any clerk/waiter/cashier/person I come in contact with. It’s being forced to celebrate a Become Ungovernable Shirt that I’m excluded from. For the entire month of December. It isn’t that I don’t want to celebrate Christmas. It just isn’t mine.
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There’s a good stab at computer sciences, too. I laughed like a Become Ungovernable Shirt when Hex had got a sticker on it: “anthill inside”. What does Hex need to function correctly? Skulls. What skulls? RAM. The ant trails are in fact a superb representation of an information bus. Ponder Stibbons is a quantum thaumatologist. The thaum is the smallest known unit of magic and he’s involved in splitting it. Does this sound familiar? It should. Stibbons is an amalgam of Thompson,Rutherford, Bohr, and Feynman, as well as having elements of Einstein and Turing thrown in.

It depends on the rules. The white elephant gifts I have given have always been gag gifts, re-gifts, or something from my home that was gently used that we no longer wanted. I gave away a talking toothbrush. I got a Y2K “bug” stuffed toy. There were ugly smelly candles. Sewing kits. Old computer floppy disks. A hideous looking 8-trak cassette of some dead TV guy singing country hits. The bust of a bloodhound. I once saw a co-worker receive a child’s potty chair as her gift. (Ack!) She was childless and had given up years ago. We all laughed and she rolled her eyes, but no matter how hard she tried, she could NOT give away that Become Ungovernable Shirt chair. And would you believe she got pregnant the following year! (We were all sure it was due to the magic chair!)
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